Steve BorissSteve Boriss (Loosely based on “Paul Revere’s Ride” by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow) Listen ye homeowners and you shall hear,That the holidays are drawing near.Soon Thanksgiving, then December twenty-five;Hardly a homeowner is now alive,Who’s not dreading guest visits this year.Guests will arrive by land, and some by air,Only to find their host’s home in disrepair.Causing said host’s reputation … Read more
Whether it’s an encouraging sign of American innovation, or a distressing sign of cultural decay, there’s no question something has been happening lately to the great American front lawn. Seems like overnight we jumped from bird baths, small statues of Mary, and an occasional pink flamingo to gigantic, holiday-themed, animated characters, with no noticeable regard … Read more
This week, I think I finally figured out why we at Fix St Louis will never be among the rich and famous. Apparently, we simply don’t think the way they do. Now, it’s not like we have NOTHING in common with rich and famous people like NFL players, Hollywood actresses, and late night comedians. For … Read more
Once upon a time, after Americans pressed the lever on a toilet, they immediately walked away. They didn’t stare inside the bowl to make sure everything went down. They didn’t listen in from the next room for a minute or two until the water stopped running. They didn’t buy a plunger for every toilet, then … Read more
At the time of this message, Florida is being tested by the awesome power of nature. In this unprecedented hurricane season, when fellow Americans are hurting, we at Fix St Louis add to your thoughts and prayers for minimal casualties and a rapid recovery. Watching the news, it’s easy to get the feeling that NO … Read more
This week on the news, we all heard some quotes from Hillary Clinton’s upcoming book. And like everything else in the world, it got me thinking about Fix St Louis and the handyman business. Secretary Clinton is claiming that at the Wash U. debate Donald Trump invaded her personal space. “It was incredibly uncomfortable,” she … Read more
We are pleased to announce that Fix St Louis has teamed-up with the Sun and the Moon for an unprecedented daytime test of your outdoor security lights. The test will begin next Monday, August 21st at 1:17 p.m. and end about a minute and a half later. Test Phase I To prepare for the test, … Read more
When you give a command to a dog (or spouse), you don’t necessarily expect it to obey without years of careful training. But not so when it comes to your windows. When you try to open and shut them, you have a right to be treated like an alpha dog (or alpha spouse). There are … Read more
Watching Jeopardy recently for the first time in many years and trying to come up with the answers (or is that questions?), I started feeling pretty good about myself. That is, until I realized that bell going off the split second the board was revealed wasn’t synced to the answer’s appearance, but to a contestant … Read more
Sometimes in the course of handyman events it becomes necessary for homeowners to dissolve the bands connecting them to those who previously fixed their homes, seeking a more perfect union. Because while all handymen might be CREATED equal, everyone knows by now they sure don’t TURN OUT that way. So, be it resolved on this … Read more