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Fix the post-election tension at Thanksgiving dinner

Your humble correspondent read this week that nearly a quarter of Americans are considering skipping Thanksgiving dinner to avoid talking about the election.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing? On the plus side, this will yield a lot more leftovers for sandwiches and future meals than in previous years for those of us who don’t skip. But on the other hand, it does cut into enjoying family and friends. And it limits our expressions of gratitude for the great country we live in and everything else.

To some, “skip or go” may be a close call. But while I pride myself on being second-to-none in enjoying leftover turkey, yams, and cranberry sauce, I’m gonna go out on a limb. While neither the Declaration of Independence nor the Constitution provide direct guidance on this, I’d think if Thomas Jefferson were around today he’d tell us to just suck it up and go. Well, maybe more dramatically and with fancier words.

As a handyman, it’s frustrating to come across problems I can’t fix. I feel guilty Fix St Louis did not do more this year to keep family members from skipping Thanksgiving. 

Fortunately, it’s not too early to start thinking about NEXT Thanksgiving. Let’s see if we can help you get the band back together then. And the place to start is having a dining room next year that is so awesome that everyone will want to sit in it, even if they’re barely on speaking terms with who’s sitting across from them.

Crown Molding
Yeah I know, installing decorative trim at ceiling level does not seem like the obvious place to start in transforming a room. But this simple upgrade adds drama to a dining room by defining the ceiling and making it seem higher. It makes a statement that this is no ordinary room — it’s a fancy room that commands respect and is somewhat formal. And as a bonus, crown molding gives dinner guests a plausible excuse to look up and avoid eye contact with their ideological adversaries seated across from them, while providing an opportunity to babble on about how much they admire it and other non-polarizing topics. Fix St Louis can install crown molding for you.

Chair Rails
Running decorative, horizontal trim about one-third of the way up from the floor has a formalizing effect on a room, just like crown molding. In fact, it works best in conjunction with complementary-styled crown molding, and tall (5”+) baseboards. Sure, Fix St Louis can handle this, too.

Coffered Ceiling
Have you ever seen wooden beams across family room ceilings? Now imagine running several parallel beams in your dining room, and several beams at right angles creating a grid pattern. Oh forget it, that’s too hard — just look at the picture below. Wouldn’t having a ceiling like THAT get the attention of your dinner guests? Now all you have to do is invite Prince William and Princess Kate, and NO ONE would skip Thanksgiving dinner. Oh, did I mention that Fix St Louis can even build complicated stuff like this?

Picture Framing
Ever see white trim arranged on a wall in rectangle shapes. Yeah, here’s another one where a picture’s worth a thousand words — see below. You can put these picture frames beneath a chair rail as shown in the picture, above a chair rail, or even take up the entire height of a wall with no chair rail.

You know, maybe it’s a good thing there wasn’t time to make these improvements for this Thanksgiving, when emotions are still at full boil. Let’s take the next year to heal, and you can showcase your dining room straight-out-of-Buckingham Palace next year. Fix St Louis will still be here, and by then your family on both sides might agree that, despite it all, our great Republic will still be here, too. We hope you and your family, whether going or skipping, have a Happy Thanksgiving!

Dr Steve
Fix St Louis

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