Your humble correspondent has had his eye on this Elon Musk fellow for quite some time – a man whose Tesla cars are reshaping the auto industry, who can bring rockets back to earth on their BOTTOMS ready for relaunch, and STILL has enough money left over to buy Twitter with pocket change.
So, we wanted to talk to Elon Musk to find out if he had any big ideas for dealing with the biggest catastrophe we at Fix St Louis face – making toilets work again now that the federal government has reduced their water tank capacities by 80%.
We tried typing “Elon Musk’s phone number toilet” into Google’s search box, but all we got back were a bunch of sites offering to find contact information for anyone we knew in our past. Well, THAT’S sure not going to help – we NEVER KNEW Elon Musk in the past!
But in the Google results we did notice that Elon Musk had co-founded a company called PayPal. We thought, hey their NAME sounds friendly – maybe they’d be willing to give us Elon Musk’s phone number and chat with us about toilets. PayPal’s phone was answered by a charming young lady. When I asked to speak with Mr Musk, she told me that he was unavailable. Sensing an accent I didn’t recognize, I asked her where she was from, and she said “Mumbai.” “Do you mean Moberly?,” I asked. “No,” she said, then she asked if there was anything else she could help me with. So I said, “Yes, I’d like to know if Elon Musk has any good ideas for businesses like Fix St Louis that repair toilets and other things in homes?” And she said, “Sure!”
Well, this young lady from somewhere in outstate Missouri was quite the salesperson. I must have hit “Add to Cart” SIX TIMES during our conversation. And as of last week, you can now see everything I bought from her to benefit customers like you in the “Pay my Bill” section of our website (www.fixsl.com). These include:
A lot of you folks find using your PayPal account easier and more secure than pulling-out your credit card and typing-in all those numbers each time you pay for something.
Now you can spread your payment out over a few weeks rather than paying all at once. No, Fix St Louis will never be like those guys on late night TV running around a furniture store saying that it’s closing, and offering zero down and zero payments for eternity to anyone who can fog a mirror, including serial killers. But for some of you, it will be a good way to get your home repairs started sooner.
You may have to ask your kids about this one. But it seems like Venmo is a very easy way to make a payment to anyone using a Smart phone – it just transfers money from the bank account or credit card of your choice to us in a couple of taps on your touchscreen.
Other Payment Options
As always, we still offer the option to pay with any major credit or debit card. No change here. You can also continue to call us with your credit card info, mail us a check, pay in cash, or have us pick-up a check from your home.
Swiss Bank Account-Level Security
We’re now offering the best assurance of online payment security we have ever offered. Fix St Louis has actually been offering online payments for years, and it has always been backed by the required online security. But why take the word of a guy who works on toilets all day when you have the assurance of someone who builds cars, launches rockets, and scares the bejeezus out of the mainstream news media?
Mr Musk, if you happen to be reading this, we’d still like to hear from you. And unlike you, we don’t hide our phone number, which is 314-434-4100. As for the rest of you, we’d like to hear from you, too. Forgot to mention it, but we do more than make it easy for you to pay us. Fix St Louis provides one stop shopping for professional home repairs.
Fix St Louis