While driving between subdivisions the other day, I found myself reading the billboards. And it struck me – why are there so many billboards for LAWYERS?
As your humble correspondent, I acknowledge there’s a lot of things I don’t understand. But I do understand that restaurants buy billboards because a lot of drivers are trying to decide where to stop for lunch. But how many times in a driver’s life are they shopping for a lawyer? And in such a hurry that they don’t even have time to pull over and write down a phone number, so instead have to be given a phone number to memorize in which every single digit is either a 3 or a 5 or a 9 or whatever?
But then I noticed something interesting. All these lawyer billboards use the word “win” – just like billboards for the lottery. OK, now I get it. These billboards are for drivers who want to win the “SLIP AND FALL” lottery. All they have to do is fall or crash, sue, and they are set for life!
Now, if you’re not so keen on becoming this kind of injured “winner”, but prefer to continue your life as a “loser”, Fix St Louis may be right for you. Because we can keep you from slipping and falling, albeit at the expense of the wealth of your family and the economic strength of St Louis’ legal sector. Here’s how.
Bathtubs & Showers
We’ve all heard tragic stories of completely healthy people slipping in a tub and shower, and instantly becoming paralyzed or worse. In the vast majority of cases, this could have been prevented if they had a short vertical grab bar where they entered the tub or shower, and a horizontal bar at the back. Sometimes that horizontal bar is angled downward so they can reach it to pull themselves up from the tub. Fix St Louis knows how to install these, even if your walls are plastic or tiled. We can also add those non-slip adhesive strips to the bottom of your tub or shower to keep your feet from slipping.
Handrails
Those one or more steps up to your front porch, or along the walkway, or from the garage into the house, may not seem like much to a young person, but can be a significant obstacle to older folks who have trouble lifting their legs or keeping their balance. Fix St Louis can install short, discrete, attractive railings that solve this problem.
Basement Stairs
It’s not uncommon for us to find stairs leading to the basement without any handrails, or with a large gap beneath a handrail big enough for someone to fall through. Again, here’s a problem that might not be noticeable to a young homeowner, but could provide a significant risk for their older guests. Fix St Louis can install the proper railings, and also secure railings that are detaching from the wall.
Sidewalks
Have some of your sidewalks settled unevenly, so there are now a series of trip hazards on the path to your front door? This is very fixable through a modernized version of mudjacking called concrete leveling. Fix St Louis can get these trip hazards removed.
So, let’s say we just keep you safe, rather than get hurt and be thrown at the mercy of a less-than-perfect judicial system. Call Fix St Louis. To quote a billboard, our customers win a lot!
Dr Steve
Fix St Louis